Saturday, October 15, 2005

Random Judgements

Yeah, Im in that mood right now. To pass random judgements. Its good I aint the Supreme Court judge. But, if you guys see what the media is obsessed with (among so many other not so relevant issues) here in StrangeLand is the caliber of their new Supreme Court judge. I think I am no worse than her if what they say is true! Well, thats a sample of how random my judgements can be today, so sample everything I say here with a mound of salt.

Here Goes...

The White House?

Ever wonder why they call the Presidential residence for StrangeLand White House? Well, I just did. And I have the answer! Because it was only meant for white people....In over 200 years of democracy, not a single black president. Well, the guys who wrote the constitution of this place intended it to be so apparently. For that matter, they never even had a woman president. Maybe they could have been more appropriate if they'd named it WhiteMan House.

Iraqi Insurgency

For the umpteenth time, StrangeLand should stop showing the insurgents in Iraq in bad light all the time. Damn, they have no idea how it feels to have somebody march into your country, strip your freedom away and force something on them in the name of democracy. Neither do I for that matter, but I can only imagine how it must feel, and what I could have done about it were I put in such a situation. It is only a natural outcome of being in the place where the Iraqi nationalists find themselves. What is wrong of course is that there are foreign guys making the most of this whole chaotic situation (namely Al-Qaeda and their friends) and getting involved to meet their ultimate objective - the personal war against StrangeLandians. Of course, they dont know better, cos they always do turn up everywhere StrangeLandians go anyway.

It is sad to see a nation with an unparalleled history (the Mesopotamia of ancient days) where culture and science and religion has been nurtured over thousands of years, just like HomeLand, having to face times like these. I agree they were suffering under the reign of a dictator. But, what StrangeLand seems to be ready to offer them is a constitution written by people "hand-picked" for the job (wonder who gets to decide) and most likely a democracy with an elected leader, yes, but one who is going to rule like a Putin or a Hosni Mubarak; more like an elected dictator.

Funniest Radio Ad

Yeah this is definitely the funniest commercial I've heard on radio. It goes like this.
"Can I borrow 99 cents?"
"Why do you need 99 cents?"
"Well, I was going to get my car fixed."
"For 99 cents?"
"No, thats a couple hundred bucks. I was planning to go the gas station to put some gas in my car."
"Gas for 99 cents?"
"No, thats about 15 dollars. I was thinking I could then go to Wendys and get myself a cheese burger for 99 cents"
"So, you have 215 dollars for your car, but you don't have the 99 cents for your cheeseburger?"
"Ok, can I borrow 215 dollars 99 cents?"
"No!"
"Ummm .. what about the 99 cents part?"

Funniest guy in my company

Yeah, Im gonna pass a judgement on this too. This guy goes by the name of jd, but I think he should be JK (cos those are his initials). This is our conversation about me helping him out with some of his bugs :

JK : "Ive got a series of bugs which I think you could deal with better. Can you look at them and let me know what we should be doing?"
Me: "Yeah, I think I can do that cos Ive seen those before. Ill let you know what we should do to handle, if there's something to do at all"
JK: "You freaking rule my world! If we have a third child, we'll name him Satwik" (Just to make it clear with all the dirty minds out there - when he says 'we', he means him and his wife)
Me: "No, that would be wrong. Every 3rd child in the world is Chinese, not Indian. I think its every 4th child in the world thats Indian."
JK: "So, I have to have 2 kids in order to name one after you? Would you just accept my heartfelt thanks and a hearty handshake in place of that?"

There's this other occasion when one other guy (MB, aged 30) from the workplace invites me to his house. He says - "Hey Sawik (they miss the 't' usually), you are welcome to come and hang out with me and my old lady for the football game". JK goes "Oh MB still lives with his mom, in case you didn't know". MB : "I was about to say, dont mention to my wife that I called her that..damn you JD".

One time, JK wanted to skip coming to office, and this is what his email said - "My wife has to visit the doctor and I am supposed to play the role of a doting husband who accompanies her to the doc, for an appointment late in the afternoon, ignoring the fact that its gonna be freaking hot."

If somewhere down the line, you felt I am funnier than this guy, write a blog on me!

Gals, Databases and AI

3 things I never really understood, and I think Im not cut out to understand them either. I atleast have the claim to fame of getting through papers on the latter two. But, them gals, damn they are so uncanny and they so hide behind a facade all the time, greatest actors ever, greatest manipulators ever too. All you guys out there are going "we know what you're talking about", and all the gals are going "What the ....". Why are gals so hard to understand? Why have databases become such a big deal that people do million dollar research on them? When AI is all theory, and nothing really seems to work, what's all the hype about, why are we still dreaming and pumping money into trying to imitate the human mind?

6 comments:

Sudhamshu said...

The Guy JD (or JK) sounds very funny :). By the way, i never understood ur last paragraph, Gals, Database and AI. whats it about?

Addicted To Chaos said...

I thought it was obvious this is nonsense. Ironically, my girlfriend loves Databases and AI, and she's a gal! That has nothing to do with my comment of course.

And another interesting thing about this JD guy - his full initials are JDK, and he's worked in a Java-based company for a long time!

Anonymous said...

nice one abt the white man house. i have to talk to my room mates abt it and ask them what they think abt it. they r americans in case u dint know satwik - amar

Anonymous said...

i too liked the white man house part of ur blog...

the last paragraph was a bouncer though....so keep in mind ur audience base when u write...

cheers

rajesh

pranayrao said...

'If we have a third child ' Thank god for the explanation later. for a moment i thought u were goin the suddhu way :D. BTW the last paragraph was all geek to me, till I read the comments. Now I believe there's hope for the hebbar dynasty :))
N rite u are bout the whiteman house thin. Cant see a black and/or woman strangeland president in the near future.
But do remember that no lady beside those belonging to dynasties (bhuttos, gandhis, etc..) have become prominent leaders in south Asia too.
@Amar: Everyone knows dat. We call it your gr8est achievement :P

Anonymous said...

That's a good point on the White House matter. It's also understandable for people in Iraq to be in a turmoil right now because so many other foreign, wanted or unwanted, are meddling into their affairs.